The following is satirical.
Over Memorial Day — as America paid tribute to those heroes who fought and died so that Gretchen Whitmer could become the Fascist Queen of Michigan — a controversy broke out over Donald Trump’s new Press Secretary Kayleigh McEnany.
At a press conference with journalists and other Democrats, Ms. McEnany was asked what time it was, whereupon she drew a samurai sword and, in a series of motions too swift for the human eye to record, she dismembered the entire White House press corps leaving them a mere collection of bleeding torsos writhing and shrieking wordlessly on the floor, which actually raised the intelligence level of their questions.
Ms. McEnany then lifted a flamethrower and reduced what was left of the journalists to a pile of ashes that blew out the window into the Rose Garden, where they acted as mulch, thus performing a useful function for the first time in their lives.
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