A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote pasture in Texas when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.
The driver, a young man in a Brioni® suit, Gucci® shoes, RayBan® sunglasses and YSL® tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you give me a calf?"
Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell® netbook computer, connects it to his Apple iPhone4S®, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.
The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop® and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany.
Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot® that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL® database through an ODBC connected Excel® spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry® and, after a few minutes, receives a response.
Finally, he prints out a full-color, 15-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet® printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."
"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of 'em," says Bud.
He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.
Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my animal?"
The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, “Okay, why not?"
"You're a U.S. Congressman," says Bud.
"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"
"No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about how working people make a living - or about cattle, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep." now give me back my dog.
David Louis Snyder's Posts (5)
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*Quit trashing Obama's accomplishments. He has done more than any other President before him. He has an impressive list of accomplishments: First President to apply for college aid as a foreign student, then deny he was a foreigner. First President to have a social security number belonging to another man, from a state he has never lived in. First President to preside over a cut to the credit-rating of the United States. First President to violate the War Powers Act. First President to be held in contempt of court for illegally obstructing oil drilling in the Gulf of Mexico. First President to require all Americans to purchase a product from a third party. First President to spend a trillion dollars on "shovel-ready" jobs when there was no such thing as "shovel-ready" jobs.* * * *First President to abrogate bankruptcy law to turn over control of companies to his union supporters. First President to by-pass Congress and implement the Dream Act through executive fiat. First President to order a secret amnesty program that stopped the deportation of illegal immigrants across the U.S. including those with criminal convictions. First President to demand a company hand-over $20 billion to one of his political appointees. First President to tell a CEO of a major corporation (Chrysler) to resign.First President to terminate America’s ability to put a man in space. First President to cancel the National Day of Prayer and to say that America is no longer a Christian nation. First President to have a law signed by an auto-pen without being present. First President to arbitrarily declare an existing law unconstitutional and refuse to enforce it. First President to threaten insurance companies if they publiclyspoke out on the reasons for their rate increases. First President to tell a major manufacturing company in which state it is allowed to locate a factory. First President to file lawsuits against the states he swore an oath to protect (AZ, WI, OH, IN). First President to withdraw an existing coal permit that had been properly issued years ago. First President to actively try to bankrupt an American industry (coal). First President to fire an inspector general of AmeriCorps for catching one of his friends in a corruption case. First President to appoint 45 czars to replace elected officials in his office. First President to surround himself with radical left wing anarchists. First President to golf 73 separate times in his first two and a half years in office, 102 to date. First President to hide his medical, educational and travel records. First President to win a Nobel Peace Prize for doing NOTHING to earn it. First President to go on multiple "global apology tours" and concurrent "insult our friends" tours. First President to go on 17 lavish vacations, including date nights and Wednesday evening White House parties for his friends paid for by the taxpayers. First President to have 22 personal servants (taxpayer funded) for his wife. First President to keep a dog trainer on retainer for $102,000 a year at taxpayer expense.* * * *First President to fly in a personal trainer from Chicago at least once a week at taxpayer expense.* * * *First President to repeat the Holy Quran & tell us the early morning call of the Azan (Islamic call to worship) is the most beautiful sound on earth. First President to tell the military men and women that they should pay for their own private insurance because they "volunteered to go to war and knew the consequences." Then he was the First President to tell the members of the military that THEY were UNPATRIOTIC for balking at the last suggestion.* * * *First President to side with a foreign nation over one of the American 50 states (Mexico vs. Arizona). -> How is Obama’s "hope and change" working out for you?*
Did I forget a $7 million dollar golf outing with Tiger Woods??????
Great night at the August meeting. Very informative talks and ideas coming from Charles Otto-38A, Mary Beth Carozza-38C Carl Anderton Jr 38B and of course Michael Andrew McDermott 38B. I was also impressed with the invocation Johan Nykvist .Psalm 1 King James Version (KJV)
1 Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor standeth in the way of sinners, nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful.
2 But his delight is in the law of the Lord; and in his law doth he meditate day and night.
3 And he shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that bringeth forth his fruit in his season; his leaf also shall not wither; and whatsoever he doeth shall prosper.
4 The ungodly are not so: but are like the chaff which the wind driveth away.
5 Therefore the ungodly shall not stand in the judgment, nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous.
6 For the Lord knoweth the way of the righteous: but the way of the ungodly shall perish.
WE were all updated by Carol Frazer on APUSH & Common Core. Did you know teachers may have to ignore their own state's U.S. History standards if they hope to prepare their students for success on the new APUSH exam-this will not cover material outside the Framework. We need to contact Teachers and Education Administrators and tell the we oppose the APUSH Curriculum FRAMEWORK Now!!
