My version of " the talk " generations of young Black men have gotten in America came from grand parents who survived Jim Crow et al without bitterness but with healthy caution about how some in society misperceive law abiding Black males.
Granted, " the talk " happened long before crack cocaine and gangster rap mutated the Black male image into the destructive icon displayed now!
I was part of the first wave to attend integrated public and private schools and with that came marching orders I faithfully followed for decades.
Highlights included:
* Don't touch anything that wasn't mine.
*Don't trespass on private property.
* Don't ask to borrow anything, refer all requests to home,
* Don't disobey the nuns ( I'm a pre-school choice kid, sent to parochial school by public educators no less ).
I can go on but here's the biggie, told to me by my loving grandmother with a fear born of life in an recently apartheid America:
* Don't go in White neighborhoods
* Don't get fresh with White girls ( and other girls too, btw ).Be a gentleman
I know these last two items may raise some eye brows in our " post racial " era but growing up in 1970s-1980s Southeast Georgia, one ignored these directives at your peril!
A White girls' false accusation of inappropriate conduct, let alone rape, had sent many young Black men in the past to their grave or lengthy imprisonment.
It wasn't until my 30s that I relaxed these rules based upon extensive observation of societal change.
That's when I first accepted a hug from a White woman. It was the 1990s and I'm sure many may snort, " What's the big deal? " but grandma's advice served me well for a lifetime.
The recent shooting death of Renisha McBride ( 19 ), a Michigan teen, by a home owner after she sought help after a car accident, touched off this walk down memory lane.
Facts haven't emerged yet but it is an apt time to review " the talk " I received about safely navigating an America less enlightened than now and necessary upgrades to address present issues.
The Old Prejudice was perpetuated by old wives tales warning Africans and American Blacks were savages tamed by the whip and words of long gone slave masters.
Now, we grapple with a New Prejudice, whose members even include wary Blacks, on guard against a swaggering thug mentality on public display daily!
Parents and mentors should update their version of "the talk " to include how today's thug culture voluntarily paints all Black youth as vandals anxious to harm anyone caught unawares.
I hope poor Renisha McBride wasn't subjected to a lethal expression of the New Prejudice, though it doesn't change the tragic outcome.
Time will tell.
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