White Critics Accuse DOJ, Rile Obama,
Barack Disbands DOJ, Creates DoI-J and DOS-J
Boldly shouting, “We don’t need no stinkin’ Constitution,” Barack Obama at a stroke eliminated any and all further criticism from legions of constitionally-aware Americans by disbanding the Depart of Justice (DOJ) and immediately replacing its functions under aegis of the Department of Injustice; and Department of Social Justice . . . immediately the liberal media lauded the move as a “brilliant stroke,” Iluv Vem at the N.Y. Tripe, “magnificent move, a long time coming” from Kleine Joe at Times underhandedonline, and over 400 individual messages of praise from JournoList.toadies.
“I see the problem, now,” said the President as he dodged accusations of reverse-racism, “it was a matter of putting the proper name to the thing that was getting in the way, all the time.” Much like Nancy Pelosi telling unbelieving listeners, “the problem is we’ve been calling it the ‘public option,’ when its really the ‘consumer option.’ So simple to correct,” folks with commnsense all around the globe immediately began banging their heads against the wall and yanking chest hair out at the president’s latest power-grab and refusal to require any accountability by his administration.
The problem all began** with a voter-intimidation case against four paramilitary attired Black Panthers in Philadelphia, accosting White voters with a nightstick and verbal abuse; and a Black poll watcher was threatened with a beating, in 2008. The case won by the Bush DOJ, was dropped by the Obama DOJ nearly 17 months after taking office. Obama-appointee to the DOJ, Deputy Assistant Attorney General Julie Fernandez also has been quoted as telling a roomful of DOJ employees that the department had “no interest in cases where Black perpetrators accosted White victims” and that the DOJ would no longer investigate irregularities in the Motor Voter Law “because that might dampen turnout.” Ms. Fernandez was obviously speaking of voter turnout by the dead, by previous residents that had moved, by illegal felons, by non residents, by duplicat names on the rolls, and other irregular voters . . . . which if stymied would decrease voter turnout. “Can dead men vote thrice,” Ms. Fernandez?
In other futurenews, the Obama Department of Social justice has been empowered to spare the president and other Democrats from researching specious opportunities to yell “Racist Pigs!” at conservatives; and protect welfare cheats from annoying prosecution. ACLU employees are lining up on the Whitehouse lawn in hopes of becoming part of the new DOSJ. And in a related story, Federal Judge Susan Bolton has been arrested for not having up-to-date rabies shots after her recent ruling against the state of Arizona immigration law; Bolton's innoculation status had first been brought to the now defunct DOJ's attention after an outcry by the Southwestern Kennel Club Veterinarians Assoc.
Ya’all live long, strong and ornery,
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